Q: My husband and I are talking about having kids, but we like our life the way it is now and don’t want it to change. Any advice?

Don’t kid yourself, life WILL change. But like anything else…you react without thought. Things become instinct. Before kids? A bomb could off and I wouldn’t wake. Then the littlest sniffle had me peeking to make sure all was okay. What experience do I bring? This single child married a man who is one of eight. Yep, you heard that right. Eight siblings, then together we had five, and now have a foster son bringing our brood to six. I’ve learned that the biggest change isn’t in having a child, but from going to one to multiples.

One child and the sky is the limit. Activities, play dates, affordability. Two children you must maneuver your time carefully. More than two… buckle up, the ride’s about to get bumpy. But there is nothing better than watching life through the eyes of a child. You all adapt, and the cool thing is no one ever realizes they have. You just DO.

Let me also give some added advice. If have kids already but aren’t sure whether you want more, or if you do want kids but can’t have your own, hang on. I have never (sadly) seen so many children in need of safe homes, or getaways. It’s a big decision. It’s a tough decision. But deep down you will know this one child, someone else’s child, NEEDS you. And you will find yourself with the biggest gift you could ever give…love.

Lastly, regardless of children, be sure to make special time for you and your significant other. Remember…it started out as two. Whether you stash a hidden dessert and after the kiddos go to bed sneak outside on your porch (deck, patio, grass?) for a quiet moment under the stars, or can actually make time for a real date night, DO IT.

~ Bobbi Romans, author of Swamp Magic, available from Crimson Romance January 28, 2013

2 thoughts on “Q: My husband and I are talking about having kids, but we like our life the way it is now and don’t want it to change. Any advice?

  1. Alicia Hunter Pace

    I love the idea of sharing a “secret dessert” after the kids are in bed. What a great way to create some couple time with just a teeny amount of effort and no babysitter!

  2. Alicia Hunter Pace

    What a great idea to share a “secret dessert” after the kids are in bed. Such a simple way to create some couple time without much trouble or a babysitter!

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